A Love of One Hundred Hearts
by onemilliongoldstars
Summary: 100 times that Rachel Berry and Jesse St James have loved each other. 4. Broken. When he sees her it's like something twigs inside of him. She's still enchanting, but somehow… she's different.
1. Flowers

**Title: A Love of 100 Hearts**

**Author: DreamsofRay**

**Story Rating: T**

**Chapter Rating: T**

**Summary: 100 times that Rachel Berry and Jesse St James have loved each other. 1. Flowers. She allowed a few tears to soak into the velvet petals, soft against her cheeks. She would escape Ohio. She would do it for him.**

**Disclaimer: Pretty darn obviously, I do not own Glee… or OSU… or NYCU… or yellow roses (that's a lie, I have owned yellow roses once, they were lovely :) ).**

**A.N. Okay, so the idea is that I have 100 words and for each word I do a St Berry one shot/drabble.**

**I'm a pretty excited to be doing this. I've been thinking of doing something like this for ages and it's great to get the chance! If you guys want me to do a certain thing, just review a word, or an idea or anything and I'll give it a shot, either on this story or as a separate one shot. But unfortunately RL is going to start kicking my ass soon so it might take me a while :(**

**I am absolutely positive that something like this will happen on the show… or is it just wishful thinking? It's a little more angsty than I expected… sorry guys, but I hope you enjoy it anyway :)**

**Xxx**

**1. Flowers**

If you asked anyone, they would tell you that Rachel Berry gets over excited.

In Rachel's eyes this wasn't necessarily true.

The problem was, that Rachel Berry lived life in this excited, ever anticipating state that meant she tended to over react, she was the glee club's resident diva after all. To Rachel Berry, life was a theatre, Lima, Ohio merely the dressing room before she hit New York for her opening number in the Big Apple. And like the theatre, everything was bright, red and gold and glitter. Life was a constant preparation for her inevitable starring role and if that meant that she tended to get over excited that so be it.

Every Christmas, since Rachel had learned to walk her first few steps (Rachel had never toddled, she was too dignified), Rachel Berry had leapt out of bed and run downstairs to gaze with wonder at the presents beneath the tree, before sorting each and every one into a pile for each member of the family. Hers was always the biggest.

Every birthday she had jumped into bed with her parents at the early hours of the morning and snuggled with them as they handed her presents and the tasty treats they kept stored in their bedside draw every year for that exact purpose.

Rachel Berry just felt differently to everyone else. She felt _more_, everything was brighter, bolder and stronger and she would never apologise for that.

However, the one morning that everyone who knew her would expect her to be pacing backward and forwards in her bunny slippers over her bedroom floor, Rachel lay, stock still in bed, staring intently at her bedroom ceiling.

She was frozen, completely paralysed in place as her mind whirred furiously. Turning, she glanced at her _Anything Goes_ calendar and stared at the small box which showed the day. She had been crossing off boxes every day this week as she counted down to this very day, the box surrounded by her favourite gold stars, but now that it was here she could barely comprehend it.

"Rachel honey?" There was an undertone of nervous excitement to her papa's voice as he stuck his head around the door, clearing his throat a little. "It's time to get up sweetie." Crossing the room in a few paces Hiram pulled open the curtains and smiled down at his baby, before leaving again.

Slowly, Rachel pulled herself, foot by tense foot, out of her bed. She went through her toilette in a daze, dressing in a purple dress, slipping on some white pumps and a white cardigan. Despite the cold weather outside, she still dressed seamlessly.

Walking down the stairs was what woke her up. The anticipation appeared, followed by the nerves and she felt her breathing begin to deepen and quicken. Hurrying her pace, she pushed open the front door and prayed that the mail had been delivered early today. If she had to wait until the end of the day, she would likely murder the mail man. Fortunately the mail box was pushed shut and she started to run, trying not to slip on the slippery ground beneath her.

Pulling it open frantically, she ignored the other letters, which fell the ground and pulled out a thick, glossy white envelope with the words _Rachel Barbra Berry_ written on it.

Gripping it tightly in her hands, she felt herself begin to shake and turned, leaving the mail on the ground and pulled open her door again. Pushing through the door, she met her fathers anxious, upturned faces in the kitchen and sat slowly in her seat, placing the envelope onto the table.

They looked at it silently for a moment.

"It's pretty big." Leroy said, slowly.

"Open it." Hiram urged, sliding it closer to her.

Taking the envelope from her, Rachel Berry was unusually quiet as she opened her letter and read the first piece of paper.

A wide smile broke out over her face and she turned to them as the nerves were lifted from her chest.

"I got in."

There was much celebration then, hugging and kissing and crying. Passages of the letter were read aloud multiple times, especially the part that commended Miss Berry on her 'impeccable application and interview, like none ever seen before.'

Checking her phone somewhere during the celebrations, she found that she had three missed calls from Kurt, which forced her to remember her duty towards the school.

Telling her dads that she had better get on, they each hugged her tightly, told her how proud they were and to have a good day of school before she left the house.

At school, she had barely parked her car before she was accosted by an excited Kurt. They gazed at each other for a long moment and then said in unison.

"I got in!"

Laughing loudly and embracing, they strolled into school together, discussing the prospect of living in New York together and their future university.

"Finn got accepted into OSU this morning." Kurt told her, as they spied the tall boy in the corridor in front of them.

Rachel nodded, realising what Kurt was all too subtly trying to say. This was it, the moment she had been dreading ever since last year.

Because Finn wasn't going to want to go to New York with her and there was no way in hell she was going to stay in Ohio. So there was no other choice. They would have to go their separate ways.

Before Rachel could duck away, he spotted them and beamed, waving wildly in their direction. Kurt cringed and gave Rachel a sympathetic squeeze on the shoulder before departing, his phone already out as he texted Blaine.

"Hey Rache." Finn beamed at her and pulled her close for a slightly awkward hug as they tried to balance their books between them,

"Hi Finn." She replied, automatically. He bent down to kiss her and she returned it, but pulled away after a moment. It just felt wrong to be kissing him with their upcoming separation so imminent and she wondered why he didn't feel the same.

"How you doing?" He asked, taking her hand in his as they made their way down the corridor.

"Very well, thank you." It felt awkward, stilted.

"Oh, cool. Me too." He couldn't stop beaming, but obviously he wasn't going to tell her his news voluntarily. It seemed a little prompting was necessary.

"Get any news today?" She asked, reluctantly, stopping to drop off some of her books at her locker.

"Yeah, actually." He dug around in his pocket and retrieved a piece of paper. "I got my acceptance from OSU."

"Really?" Her extensive acting training allowed her to sound legitimately surprised.

"Yeah," He grinned at her, his eyes bright. "Football. Isn't it great?"

"Great Finn," She replied, trying not to meet the boy's eyes.

"Hey, what about you? Did you get…"

He was cut off by the bell and Rachel felt instant gratitude towards the interruption. "We'll talk later okay?" She said, not giving him chance to reply as she hurried away to her class, relief seeping through her ever nerve at the near miss.

She knew that the confrontation would have to come by sooner or later, it had been building for months.

She would just rather it was later as opposed to sooner.

Her classes went by in record time, which irritated her thoroughly and when lunch came around and along with it Glee club, she felt about ready to bolt at the thought of the upcoming argument.

"Have you told him yet?" Kurt asked as they walked together to Glee and she could only shake her head.

"Rache!" The call from down the corridor made her jump and she had to suppress her reaction to just turn and run.

"Get it over and done with." Kurt advised, slipping through the choir room door and leaving her to face her fate on her own.

"Hey," Finn grinned goofily at her and she tried to smile through her nerves as he took her hand in his and lead her into the choir room, where most of the club had already gathered and were talking happily amongst themselves.

"So," He said, as they sat down. "I wanted to talk to you about something."

"Oh," Rachel was grateful when her voice didn't crack. "What's that?"

"Did you get any acceptance letters this morning?"

"Uh… yeah. I got one... from NYCU."

"Oh," Finn's eyebrows furrowed and he continued. "What about OSU?"

"Finn," She sighed heavily. "I didn't _apply_ for OSU."

"What? Of course you did, you had a form."

"One that _you_ gave me Finn." She tried to keep the irritation from being obvious to the boy in front of her. "I didn't fill it in."

"Oh." Finn seemed despondent for a moment, before perking up. "Well, you can always apply again in April Rache, don't worry about it."

"I'm not applying in April, Finn." Her voice was firm, unmoving.

"Why not?" He asked, perplexed. "Do you not want to go to college Rache."

She sucked in a sharp breath at that and tried to keep the anger down.

"_Of course_, I do Finn. I'm going to NYCU."

"What?" His sharp voice rang out through the room and Rachel thought she saw Kurt cringe. "Why the hell would you do that?"

"Because that's where I need to be Finn!" She snapped, her anger making her voice rise too, a high soprano.

"_Why?"_ He demanded, glaring at her. "What's there that isn't here Rache?"

"What isn't?" She repeated, scoffing at his idiotic question. "I'm going to study theatre in New York Finn."

There was an awful moment of silence and then, perhaps even worse, the unmistakable sound of Finn laughing. Tears pricked in her eyes and she stared at him, speechless.

"I'm sorry," Finn spluttered over his own mirth. "Rache I didn't know you were _serious_ when you told me that."

Her voice turned icy and every single member of New Directions fell silent to watch the argument between the two co-captains. "I was."

"Seriously? You expect to get somewhere studying theatre?"

Rachel bristled and Finn seemed to realise, suddenly, just how angry she was, because he backtracked quickly.

"You can still study theatre if you want Rache, but here in Lima, then you could go and do stuff with the amateur dramatics and I could run Kurt's dad's tire shop, it'd be great!"

Rachel shuddered at the image he was conjuring and shook her head firmly. "No Finn, no way. Do you really expect me to just give up all I've ever dreamed of?"

"Don't I mean that much to you?" He shouted and she could practically feel the fury trembling through her.

"I can't believe you're trying to make me chose! You or my career, that's not fair Finn!"

"There shouldn't be a choice!" He cried and then his tone abruptly changed to that cajoling, whining tone that really scratched on Rachel's nerves. "Come on Rache, you don't really want to go to New York do you?"

She could only cry out in fury, turn on her heel and storm from the room, as she had done so many times before.

The drive home was pretty dangerous, if she thought about it. Half blind, she drove, tears streaming down her face and pulled up in her driveway. Slamming her door loudly, she stormed through the door, throwing herself on her bed and crying heavily, tears soaking into the cotton of her comforter.

It was ridiculous to be upset over this, she had known all along that this was how it would go, that she would end up hurt and he would end up angry. She had just never expected the ridicule, never expected how much it would hurt her that he thought that way of her.

Finn was such an _idiot_. So ridiculous, so stupid and so careless too. She had always known that he wasn't exactly the sharpest crayon in the box, but she had never known that he could be so _cruel_.

The sound of knocking breaks through her inner musings and she sniffed deeply, wiping her face hastily on her comforter and then immediately regretting it when she saw the streak of mascara left on the pale coloured cloth.

The knocking came again, so she hurried downstairs, pulling the door open and hoping that it wasn't Finn.

Instead a delivery man stood before her, mostly hidden by a huge bouquet of sunshine yellow roses.

"Miss Rachel Berry?" His voice was muffled by the flowers and she hurried to relieve him of his burden, taking the roses in her arms.

"Yes?" She asked, glancing at him.

"Delivery for you, sign here?"

Bemused, she did as he said and asked. "Where from?"

"What do I look like, an oracle? I'm pretty sure it'll be on the card kid."

Raising her eyebrows she huffed and turned, slamming the door on him before he'd even made it down the garden path. Padding through to the kitchen, she placed the roses gently on the table and peered through the glowing buds, eventually finding a small white card.

_Congratulations, I always knew you could do it. _

_J St J_

The card fluttered to the floor from her limp hand and she had to reach out a hand to steady herself on the table.

Jesse St James had sent her flowers? How had he even known about NYCU? And why, in God's name, was _he_ congratulating her?

Rachel wasn't an idiot. She knew what she had done to Jesse. She had led him on, made him believe she loved him and then kissed someone else on stage in front of him. The look in his eyes still haunted her to that very day. It took a lot to hurt Jesse, but in that one look, she managed to see that she crushed him. And though she would have expected to get some perverse pleasure out of it, all she felt was guilt and sorrow. Both of which she had tried to quash fully over the following summer, but never quite succeeded.

Glancing over at the roses, she ran her hand gently over the buds, all in their prime and sighed a little.

Finn hadn't even taken the time to congratulate her, he had just moved straight into mocking and shouting at her.

Suddenly she pulled out her phone, scanned down to his name and fired off a quick text.

_How did you know?_

A moment later, a reply came through and she snatched up her phone with unreasonable urgency.

_There was no way you wouldn't get in. It's an inevitability. _

She replied quickly, her heart thrumming in her chest.

_Thank you Jesse._

After a moment of pacing back and forth across the kitchen floor and biting her nails anxiously, her phone buzzed with an incoming text.

_No worries. You deserve it, you'll get out of that cow town soon Rache. Don't let anything hold you back. _

Turning, she plucked one rose from the bouquet and held it to her nose, inhaling the sweet scent. Silently she allowed a few tears to soak into the velvet petals, soft against her cheeks.

She would escape Ohio. If nothing else, she would do it for Jesse.

**Xxx**

**Hope you liked it! Give me your thoughts :) Maybe seven reviews before an update? **

**Love Ray **

**xxx**


	2. Jealousy

**Title: A Love of 100 Hearts**

**Author: DreamsofRay**

**Story Rating: T**

**Chapter Rating: T**

**Summary: 100 times that Rachel Berry and Jesse St James have loved each other. 2. Jealousy: it's eating him up, consuming his very being and no matter how much he tries to ignore it, it comes crawling back.**

**Disclaimer: Pretty darn obviously, I do not own Glee, or Jonathan Groff, or Jack Daniel's. If I did I'm pretty sure I'd have a lot more money than I do.**

**A.N. This one's an angsty one I'm afraid, the next one will be more cheerful, I promise!**

**Okay… enjoy!**

**Xxx**

**1. Jealousy**

The jealousy is eating him up inside.

It's like some huge weigh his been placed in his gut and no matter how he tries to ignore it, _ignore her_, it still comes crawling back, reminding him of everything he's done and what it's cost him.

He's felt this feeling once before in his life. When he stood at the very back of the auditorium at Regionals last year and watched them sing together. Watched the touches, the looks, the caresses that they exchanged. This year was worse, he's concluded that much. Watching them kiss, on stage in front of an audience of thousands…

It cuts him to the quick just thinking about it.

He's not naive.

He knows what he's done, how he's hurt her.

Every time he closes his eyes he sees her, watching him with those irresistible chocolate eyes. The hurt and betrayal there is downright painful, but he convinces himself, almost masochistically, that he deserves this.

He's tried to tell himself that she's happy, that… _he_ will make her happy, but all he can see is that one night, after he'd come back, when she broke down in his arms and cried over him, confessing all of his short comings.

It makes his blood boil.

Which is pretty fucking hypocritical, to be honest, because, if what he's heard on the grapevine is true, she pretty much broke down after the egging incident.

He runs a hand through his hair, pulling at the wayward locks with a fierce aggression.

If he's being totally honest, it isn't just that she's with someone else, as much as that hurts him, it's that it's _Finn Hudson_.

Because Finn Hudson is an imbecile. He really is. He's insensitive, idiotic and can't hold a pitch to save his life.

And Finn Hudson hurts Rachel. Over and over again.

He knows it's going to happen again, it always works that way. He'll hurt her, she'll hide it and he'll just keep on hurting her until she either (and rightfully so) explodes and gives him a piece of her mind or (and this option is horrifying) she becomes a shell of her formerly amazing self.

He wont let that happen though.

Rachel Berry may have given up on him, but there's no way in hell that he's giving up on Rachel Berry.

But for now, he decides that Rachel Berry can wait and wanders off through the crowded New York streets to drown his jealousy in a Jack Daniel's bottle.

**Xxx**

**Like? Hate? Love? Tell me!**

**I'm hoping for the former I must admit :) **

**Thank you all so much for the reviews and I'm sorry it's so small. School's just starting up again and this absolutely evil teacher has given me so much work it's unbelievable. I should post again soon, after all, I only have like one more day to do all of this, so I'll either do it, or not do it and get screamed at… either way I'll have time to write. **

**Um… seven reviews then an update? Thank you!**

**Love Ray xxx**


	3. Flashback

**Title: A Love of 100 Hearts**

**Author: DreamsofRay**

**Story Rating: T**

**Chapter Rating: K**

**Summary: 100 times that Rachel Berry and Jesse St James have loved each other. 3. Flashbacks. The two children are deep in conversation. "Of course, Fanny Brice is **_**the**_** most iconic Broadway role." **

**Disclaimer: Pretty darn obviously, I do not own Glee, or Fame or Blood Brothers or… the ring finger? Well I own my ring finger obviously but… well you get what I mean. **

**A.N: I absolutely loved writing this. I got to try out little Rachel and Jesse and it was so much fun! I will most likely return to them :) Enjoy!**

**xxx**

**3. Flashbacks**

_AU_

It's five o'clock in the evening and the sun is slowly setting over the New York sky line, casting a silhouette of darkness. She sits on their armchair, a book forgotten in her lap as she watches the sun set. Somewhere in the background, the TV is playing and Barbra's voice is singing out loudly through the apartment. They have a gorgeous view of New York and she likes to take advantage of that every evening.

Glancing at the clock, she wonders what time he'll be back and runs a hand over the gold band on the ring finger on the left hand, a nervous habit she's picked up. Her hand drops to run over her swollen stomach and she remembers, fondly, the first time she ever met him.

_xxx_

_The theatre is dark, with the exception of the stage, where an amateur production of _Fame!_ is going on. In her seat near the front, a girl of around nine sits. She is attempting to keep her displeasure off her face, one hand playing with her dark hair, while the other rests in her lap, among the ruffles of her blue, going out dress. Beside her, her daddy's are succeeding better than she is and have small, half smiles on their faces. _

_The girl fidgets and sighs quietly to herself, thanking the Gods when the curtain closes for the end of the first act. _

_Taking her daddy's hand in one of her small ones and her papa's hand in the other, they walk out into the foyer of the small theatre, stretching their legs. _

"_Do you want a drink sweetie?" Hiram, her papa, asks. _

"_Iced water, please." She flashes her best angelic smile and Leroy, her daddy, leads her to a small table. She perches on the settee beside him, her small legs barely reaching the ground. _

"_Daddy," She says. "Can I go and look at the fliers?"_

"_Okay honey, just be careful." Her daddy tosses a fond smile in her direction and she jumps from the settee, slipping through the crowds towards the stand where the fliers for upcoming shows are held. _

_She stands back, an amusing picture, with one hand on her jutted hip and a thoughtful expression on her small, pretty face. Reaching out, she takes a flier for a touring production of _Blood Brothers _and goes back to considering. _

"_Aren't you a little young to be watching _Blood Brothers_?" Asks a voice from behind her and she turns on her Mary Jane clad heel and is faced with a twelve year old boy. _

_His unruly hair is curly and long and he's dressed in black jeans and a light grey shirt, looking at her with a considering gaze. _

"_It's a classic musical and I intend to see every version I can." She replies haughtily and then adds. "Besides, I'm mature enough to watch it, unlike some of my peers."_

"_Oh are you?" He asks, his mischievous blue eyes sparkling. "Well, I think it's my duty, as your elder, to inform you that you shouldn't be looking at that." _

_He reaches over and plucks the flier from her hand, replacing it. _

"_Hey!" She reaches for it again, but he stands in front of her, not letting her get to it. _

_He tuts her and says. "No, you're too young."_

_She can see that he's just doing it to irritate her, to get a rise out of her, so she turns and marches away, still fuming. _

_When she returns to her parents, they try to get an answer out of her, but she just says. "Little boys are so immature daddy." _

_She sits through the first three numbers of the second act, still seething secretly, but then an actress comes on and proceeds to completely murder yet another number and even her anger isn't enough to distract her. _

"_Papa." She pulls on Hiram's sleeve and asks, in a whisper. "I need the bathroom."_

"_Okay sweetie, do you need me?" _

_She shakes her head and squeezes out past him, hurrying quickly form the theatre until she gets through a door and the yowling is, fortunately, cut off._

_Shaking her head, she goes to perch on a settee again when a voice stops her. _

"_Some people just shouldn't be allowed on stage."_

_Turning, she glowers at the boy from earlier, but agrees reluctantly. "You're right, they shouldn't."_

"_Especially not if they're going to completely devastate one of the most groundbreaking musicals of all time." He huffs and sits beside her. _

_She watches him with new eyes, frowning a little. "Agreed." She sounds almost puzzled and then adds. "Did you have to leave too?"_

_He nods fervently. "I was considering not going back in after I met you, but I held up some hope for the dancing." He shakes his head regretfully and she finds herself doing the same. _

"_Just awful, you'd think they'd get actual dancers, I mean, it's Fame."_

_He turns and fixes her with a long look. Then, slowly, he holds out his hand to her. _

"_Jesse St James."_

"_Rachel Berry." She replies, shaking the hand and nodding at him. _

"_Good to meet you."_

_Rachel's daddies leave the musical to find their little girl deep in conversation with a boy around twelve years old. As they approach, they hear Rachel say, "The fact is Fanny Brice is the most iconic role on Broadway."_

"_Of course." The boy agrees, wholeheartedly, nodding. "Barbra is absolutely legendary." _

_Leroy Berry exchanges a glance with his husband and calls out to his daughter. "Rachel?"_

_Turning, she smiles widely at them and motions to the boy next to her to follow her as she hurries towards them. "Daddy, papa, this is Jesse." _

"_Good to meet you Mr Berry, Mr Berry," The boy says, politely and gravely shakes each man's hand. "If you'll excuse me, I should get going now, my au pair is waiting, but I'll see you soon Rachel."_

"_Okay," Rachel smiles widely at him and he hurries off into the crowds, leaving Rachel to take her perplexed fathers' hands and make her happy way home. _

_From then on, Jesse St James is a rather permanent feature in Rachel Berry's life. _

The door bangs open and she looks up, smiling widely at him as he crosses the room towards her, bringing her into his arms for a tender embrace as he presses a soft kiss to her forehead.

"And how is Mrs St James today?" He asks, smiling.

"I… _we_ are fine."

His hand shifts to her belly and he caresses it gently. She places her own hand over his and looks up at him, her eyes softened by affection.

All is well in the St James household.

**Xxx**

**Like it? I hope you did, because I did! It was longer than the last one at least. **

**I'd love it if you came and followed me over on tumblr, I'll post previews, ideas and random musings that you may enjoy. Also, I put a few little ficlets on sometimes, ones that I deem to small for this site, I hope you enjoy them :)**

**Follow me at onemilliongoldstars dot tumblr dot com and I'll happily follow back :)**

**Thank you to you guys who reviewed that tiny little thing I posted last time :): northstar61, Dudly, .Lock, xXSerendipitous SpontaneityXx, XxBlackShadowMagicxX, auhaes55, and SAgleek22. **

**Sorry it took me so long guys, I wanted to finish off a future chapter before I posted (you know I like to plan in advance) and **_**apparently**_** my final exams are more important than St Berry fanfiction! Who knew? Certainly not me.**

**Please review! 7 seem a good number?**

**Love Ray **

**xxx**


	4. Broken

**Title: A Love of 100 Hearts**

**Author: DreamsofRay**

**Story Rating: T**

**Chapter Rating: M**

**Summary: 100 times that Rachel Berry and Jesse St James have loved each other. . When he sees her it's like something twigs inside of him. She's still enchanting, but somehow… she's different. **

**Disclaimer: Pretty darn obviously, I do not own Glee… or Streisand… or Wall Street. **

**WARNING: THIS CHAPTER IS RATED AN M! Please use your discretion. Includes swearing and mentions of domestic abuse.**

**A.N: This one was a little strange for me to write and, I warn you now, it's a bit dark. But, there is lots of Protective!Jesse, which I know you all love ;)**

**Xxx**

4. Broken

It's late at night. The party had gone on longer than he originally anticipated and now he's left to find his own, stumbling way back to his apartment. He's just glad that there's no one to disturb him there and that it's dark enough that any paparazzi lurking won't see that Jesse St James, Broadway star, is wandering home with bloodshot eyes and bad breath.

He doesn't party often, it does him no good in the long run, and he knows that. It did enough damage in LA, where he had tried to drown his regrets in alcohol and faceless girls.

He mutters a cruse under his breath when he stumbles over something in the dark light and is about to step around it when he hears a slight mumble and a grunt. Glancing down, he is surprised to see a person, huddled in on themselves, taking shelter under a large, dark overcoat.

He may be drunk, be he's not so far gone that he doesn't worry if he's hurt the person he's effectively just kicked. Bending down, he asks, trying to keep the slur out of his voice.

"Sorry, are you okay?"

There's no reply and he frowns, pushing the messy hair away from her (it's definitely a woman) face, to reveal pale, cold skin.

He jolts, literally jolts back at the sight of her. There are deep bags under her eyes and her cheeks are hollow. A large, red mark is gracing her cheek and a small, healing, cut scars her hairline.

"Rachel?" He breathes, but she doesn't stir and he hastily pulls her into his arms, carrying her easily through the streets towards his apartment, which, fortunately, isn't very far away.

Using his back, he pushes through the door and manages to unlock his door with some difficulty and muttered curses. Hurrying into his apartment, he lies her gently on the couch, not caring that the dirt on the overcoat rubs off onto the cream fabric.

Grabbing a bottle of water (he keeps them readily accessible in the fridge), he sips it desperately, trying to rid himself of the alcohol in his bloodstream so that he can maybe think clearly.

When he gets back into his living room, her eyes are open and she's gazing around, the fear in her eyes alarming.

"Jesse?" She whispers through a hoarse throat when he appears and he stands, stock still, staring at her silently, before slipping into the seat beside her and saying.

"Rache."

"What… where am I?" She's trying to sit up, glancing around frantically.

"My apartment." He explains shortly, still watching her closely.

"Your apartment?" She's confused, he can see, but some of the panic has died in her eyes. "Why…? How…?"

She leaves the questions hanging and he answers them quickly.

"I found you, in the street. I tripped over you." There's an obvious inquiry in there somewhere, but she ignores it, not meeting his eyes as she says.

"Oh, that was you? I kind of thought it was a dream."

She's being purposefully blasé about the whole thing, unwilling to talk to him and he can see the tension in her shoulders, the barely covered worry in her eyes.

"Well I'm guessing that would happen if you sleep in the street."

His voice is hard and angry and she flinches at the sound.

"I'll leave…" She pushing herself up off the couch, but he beats her to the door, standing in her way.

"Sit down." He tells her, firmly.

A flash of fear runs through her eyes, which she tries to cover by tossing her hair and saying, indignantly. "Get out of my way. I'm very grateful to you for getting involved, but I'm no longer your concern."

She's right too, she isn't his concern anymore. She hasn't been since Nationals 2012, right here in this very city. Which is why it's so crazy that he cares so much about her now.

"Sit down." He repeats, "I want to talk to you."

She has no good reason to deny him, so she sits slowly and elegantly crosses her legs, revealing two long, smooth legs.

Watching her, he sits back in his chair.

"Do you wanna tell me why you were sleeping in the street, or do I have to drag it out of you?"

She flinches a little again and says, her voice softer. "It doesn't matter."

"It does to me." He snaps, and she cringes back again. "What's happened Rachel?"

"Nothing." Her voice has an undercurrent of stress. "Nothing has happened."

"Well then why aren't you playing against me on Broadway?"

She tosses him a disparaging glance and says. "I was never going to play opposite you Jesse."

"Why?" He asks. "Should I be offended?"

She shakes her head. "No, I was just never going to be on Broadway."

There's a beat of shocked silence and he finally manages to choke out a reply.

"What the hell?" He asks, his voice indignant. "What exactly have you given up your Broadway dreams for?"

"I'm not… I don't…" She just shakes her head and he's surprised to see, suddenly, that she's crying. Instantly, he's mollified and regretting his angry words.

"Hey," He goes to sit beside her on the couch, laying a tentatively comforting hand on her shoulder and isn't really surprised when he feels her flinch beneath him.

"What's wrong Rache, please tell me?"

She gazes up at him for one long moment and then looks away again. "I didn't make it. I just… didn't… couldn't."

"Ridiculous," He replies, immediately. "If anyone were ever going to make it, it would be you Rachel Berry."

She's shaking her head before he's even finished. "No, you don't understand."

Sighing, he pushes himself up and wanders into the kitchen, quickly brewing a pot of coffee and pouring two mugs. When he returns to the lounge, she's curled in on herself more, playing with something between her fingers. He's alarmed to see that there are still tears in her eyes.

"Here," He says, gently and places the two cups on the stylish coffee table in front of them. He's suddenly aware of just how vulnerable she is. How small and breakable she seems.

Cautiously, she reaches for her cup and takes an experimental sip. "Soy milk." She says softly. "And half a teaspoon of sugar."

"Of course," He replies, his hopes lifting slightly as he sees the ghost of a smile on her lips.

"You remembered." He's worried when he sees a tear drop into the coffee mug and she hastily wipes away the few that are starting to trail down her cheeks.

"Here." He hands her a box of tissues and she takes one gratefully.

"Want to talk about it?"

She smiles wryly, no joy in her expression and says, one tear still slipping down her bruised cheek. "Do I have a choice?"

He shrugs and murmurs. "There's always a choice Rachel."

She's quiet for a long moment and he's about to open his mouth to say something, whether to comfort or prompt her, he doesn't know, when she starts talking.

"I went to Julliard. Graduated top of the class. I thought I was destined to be on Broadway. I kept auditioned, but they kept saying they wanted something different, something more. Fairer skin, lighter hair, a smaller nose." She shrugs, staring down at her coffee. "There was always something. I wasn't put off at first, I knew it would be hard. I got a job waitressing to pay the rent… and a year after graduating I hadn't found _the_ part. But I was okay with it." She sighs heavily, "then I saw Kurt again. He was big, I knew that already, working with the stars, the designers. He was surprised to see what had become of me… offered me help." Her voice cracks over the last word and he resists the erg to pat her arm again.

"That was when I knew it was over. I worked more hours at the restaurant… stopped auditioning. I just couldn't do it any more." She glances up at him and smiles weakly. "But you. You would always get somewhere, I knew that… big shot Broadway hit. I knew you could do it."

He's staring at her, he knows and she shifts uncomfortably under his gaze. Suddenly realising that she's still in the large overcoat, he says, numbly.

"Here, let me take that." Gently, he eases it off her shoulders and places it on the armchair. Turning, he's shocked still at what he sees. There's a deep bruise running up her arm that looks angry and red.

"Rache…" He breathes, his gaze horror filled. Glancing down, she realises what he's looking at and tries in vain to cover the injuries.

"What happened?" He sits heavily beside her and she shrugs, nonchalant.

"I fell, it's fine."

"Rache, don't lie to me." He tells her, anger in his tone. "Tell me what's happened to you!"

He sees her cringe, delicately, as he raises his voice.

"Nothing." She repeats.

He's about to say something, when the ringing of her phone cuts him off. He peers unashamedly over her shoulder as she opens a text from someone called Jason.

_Where the fuck are you? _

"Shit." She curses under her breath, but he pushes her back into the couch when she tries to stand.

"Who is this guy?" He's proud of the composure in his voice.

"No one, he's no one."

His composure cracks.

"Tell me Rachel! Who the hell is this guy? Tell me right now, or I swear dear God, I will follow you back and ask him myself!"

And then she breaks.

Tears run down her cheeks with abandon and a muffled sob escapes her lips, making her body heave and shudder. She buries her face in her hands and then she's crying, moisture dripping between her fingers.

"Rache, please, I'm sorry." He takes her in his arms unthinkingly, pulling her close and running a soothing hand through her hair. "Please, baby, don't cry. It's okay, I'm here."

They rock gently for a few moments before she sniffs and a small voice comes from her throat.

"He was… a banker… for Wall Street. Smooth, charming…. He was so kind. In the first year, I thought I'd found my soul mate… even when I moved in with him. He… he asked me to marry him and I said yes…" He isn't quiet sure why, when she produces a delicate silver band, his heart breaks even further. "And then… he started having the extra drink after work, with dinner, after dinner. He started telling me not to think about Broadway, about my dreams. He made me give up my job at the restaurant… said I didn't need it now I had him. He said he didn't want a showgirl for a wife. He told me I would never make it, so I might just as well give up." Her voice breaks again and her holds her tighter, trying to erase the pain she's holding deep inside her.

"Oh Rache." He murmurs into her hair, damp with rain.

"He never… he's never… not until tonight. He was drunk, he came home and… I hadn't done dinner and I was sat watching Striesand on the TV. He was upset, he doesn't like musicals." She shakes her head against him. "I ran away before he could do anything else. That's why I was sat in the sidewalk. I had no money, nothing but my phone and I just couldn't bring myself to call anyone… thought they'd say I was over reacting."

"No… oh God no baby." He holds her like he's never going to let go, holding her tightly in her arms and placing a soft kiss to her forehead. "Please… never go back to him. Just stay here… I'll go and get your things." And give Jason a few things to think about while he's there too. "Please, just stay with me."

"Here?" She asks, softly, glancing around.

"Yes, just stay with me. I have a spare room… please?"

"Really?" She looks up at him through impossibly long lashes and he nods fervently. "I… would like that very much." She says finally, her voice suddenly losing the stress and strain it's had ever since she woke up.

"Thank you." Is all he can say.

He'd fix his angel. No matter what the cost.

**Xxx**

**I'm sorry, that ending was incredibly cheesy :D oops, my bad.**

**Sorry for the wait too- I'm so rushed at the moment but I wanted to give you guys **_**something**_** and when I saw the prompt word I was like right: write. **

**So, I hope you can cope with the wait and the shortness of this chapter. **

**StBerry Lover24, you asked if I could do a one shot where Rachel had her baby- I can sure give it a go, but you'll have to give me a little time if you're still interested :) Thanks for the request!**

**If any of you guys want to give me a work or a request or anything, it'd be my pleasure to respond :)**

**I'm feeling so Christmassy because I'm listening to the new glee Christmas album XD**

**Thank you to:xXSerendipitous SpontaneityXx, movielover97, northstar61, StBerry Lover24, Broadwayfreak5357, , SNL (I might write some more, they're so cute) and auhaes55. **

**Thank you so much for the reviews, you guys are awesome. **

**Love **

**Ray **

**xxx **


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